Sunday, September 14, 2008

Hilarious or Evil? You Decide!

Myself*, Cheryl, and Niecey July 2006

Baby Sibling has decided that she wants to share some of her favorite interactions with Nieceypoo. She interrupted my blog reading and insisted I post them on the bloggity (yes I call my blog "the bloggity" or "the bloggity blog"). Here is the proof:
"The" Cheryl says: blog bout that one looool
"The" Cheryl says: tell em bout the dog plant too
"The" Cheryl says: go on
"The" Cheryl says: do eeet
"The" Cheryl says: and the mailing her moma in that tiny box
"The" Cheryl says: and the baboon zoo

And here is my deal with her:
Karen says: If my readers are all, "Awww poor Niecey being traumatized by her evil Auntie Cheryl" I am so publishing the "Auntie Cheryl is the meanest auntie ever!" comments!

Story 1: Whelpling** and the Big Scary Bug
"The" Cheryl says: hyuk hyuk hyuk hyuk hyuk
"The" Cheryl says: Whelpling
"The" Cheryl says: lol
"The" Cheryl says: ha ha ha ha
"The" Cheryl says: So There's a male mosquito down here
"The" Cheryl says: and Whelpling's scared o it yeah
"The" Cheryl says: lolls
"The" Cheryl says: and so and so She grabs a block and gives me one yeah
"The" Cheryl says: LOOOOL
"The" Cheryl says: and and
Karen says: They are big and creepy looking
"The" Cheryl says: she's trying to find it and when she does She's all freaked out
"The" Cheryl says: *laughs more*
"The" Cheryl says: So I smash it with a block
"The" Cheryl says: and then have her smash the block with her block
"The" Cheryl says: and I tells her
"The" Cheryl says: I tells her
"The" Cheryl says: LOL
"The" Cheryl says: "Hold the two blocks otherwise it might get up and it'll be mad"
"The" Cheryl says: looool lol lol
"The" Cheryl says: She's stuck holdin the blocks now
"The" Cheryl says: and then
"The" Cheryl says: the kicker
Karen says: You do realize that you are evil right?
"The" Cheryl says: after she spent a good minute grinding the two blocks
"The" Cheryl says: the bug's obviously dead
"The" Cheryl says: ha haa haaaaa
"The" Cheryl says: and then
"The" Cheryl says: and then
"The" Cheryl says: she accidentally drops the blocks
"The" Cheryl says: and SCREAMS bloody murder
"The" Cheryl says: running away crying
"The" Cheryl says: (rofl)
"The" Cheryl says: as if it lived an shit
Karen says: You deserve any damage to your ears from the screaming...
"The" Cheryl says: none whatsoever
"The" Cheryl says: twas so worth it with the set up
Karen says: My poor traumatized little niecey
"The" Cheryl says: I er twas harmless
"The" Cheryl says: only eats plant stuff
"The" Cheryl says: nooooo, she didn't listen ta me
Karen says: They are huge and scary looking and she has our mother as a great example of being a bugphobe...

Story 2: Whelpling and the Baboon Zoo
"The" Cheryl says: Well long ago Whelpling like to misbehave, like every kid that age I know. So one day I gather up a good rippin' yarn. I tell Whelpling, who was in the middle of being a darn good pest, if she wanted to behave like a monkey I was gunna send her straight to the monkey zoo.
"The" Cheryl says: of course I had to pick the freakiest lookin monkey she disliked the most and inevitably it evolved into the Baboon Zoo
"The" Cheryl says: and so, I tells her she'll have a baboon mama and she cries, that she has a moma and doesn't want a baboon one
"The" Cheryl says: and I tells her she'll have a baboon pa, and she cries she doesn't want a baboon pa she has a pa
"The" Cheryl says: and so on so forth until the whole~ family is covered as baboons, something she didn't want.
"The" Cheryl says: I'm holding back laughing my butt off and over time the baboon threat weakened and naturally as all small whelps, she started not believing me
"The" Cheryl says: she got cocky
"The" Cheryl says: really really cocky about this
"The" Cheryl says: until I grabbed a box
"The" Cheryl says: a really small box
"The" Cheryl says: I told her to get in, that she was being shipped to the baboon zoo. Hoo boy did she pitch a fit
"The" Cheryl says: up until she figured out she couldn't possibly fit in the box and I was laughing too hard ta be serious

Story 3: Whelpling can buy It on E-bay
"The" Cheryl says: THEN came another day of Whelpling shinanigans, she wouldn't stop being obnoxious
"The" Cheryl says: I told her if she didn't stop bugging her Mama I was going to sell Mama on ebay
"The" Cheryl says: and she yet again didn't believe me so whilst she was busy in the kitchen being an ultra pesty pest [Middle Sister] hid and I grabbed a small box.
"The" Cheryl says: I told Whelpling that I sold Mama for five bucks and she was being mailed out now. She looks at the small box in horror and starts yelling at me to let Mama out of the box
"The" Cheryl says: Naturally I put it out on the front step, kid followin behind me, yowling. Never mind the box was way too small to hold even the skinest of Mamas
"The" Cheryl says: meanwhile, her Mama is sneakin up silently behind Whelpling and right as I put the box down [Middle Sister] yells "BOO!" and Whelpling squeaks turning around and yelling happily "Mama! You're not in the box!" and yet again, I get to laugh my butt off

Story 4: Whelpling and the Dog Plant
My aunt's dog, not the dog in the story.
"The" Cheryl says: We were playing outside and of course the neighbors' dog comes on over for Whelpling pets
"The" Cheryl says: The dog is shedding and we both end up covered in fur
"The" Cheryl says: I pluck up a few and tell Whelpling that if she plants the fur, a dog plant will grow. She naturally believes me and grabs the fur and digs a little hole, puts the fur in, covers it and pats it gently down. It was so precious. She even watered it!
"The" Cheryl says: now this year a columbine grew in that spot***. Whelpling was so happy
"The" Cheryl says: "Look Auntie Cheryl! My dog plant grew!"
"The" Cheryl says: it was just so very cute
Picture of a columbine.

-----Copy LiteralDan Section-----
* Yes I used to "rock" the bangs, this was when I had started to grow them out.
** Cheryl calls Niecey such names as Whelp, Whelpling, Pest, Brat, Wee One, Bratling. She insisted that I call her Whelpling. Hijacks my blog and then insists I rename Nieceypoo...
*** Here is Loren's footnote, thanks for the comment and bringing to my attention a hole in Auntie Cheryl's narrative, bratty sibling neglecting the facts! She had Niecey plant the fur in one of the garden plots, the one I had heavily seeded with columbine seeds. Though she may not have known I had seeded that bed, I do remember her discovering she had pulled some columbines out of it thinking they were weeds until she saw the others coming up...


loren said...

What a mean aunt!!!!

:) lol

That dog plant thing is funny... what are the odds that the plant would grow there?!?

The Microblogologist said...

The odds were very high since it was my garden and I seeded it with columbine seeds! I'm going to edit to add a footnote on that one, lol. I wonder if she has figured out she isn't going to get a dog out of it yet... That is what was kinda mean to me, she wants a dog soooooo bad and Cheryl told her it would grow a dog. If it wouldn't result in my death (which it totally would) I would make a stop at the local humane society...